“Liberated: the new sexual revolution” – shocking and eye-opening must see documentary.

Blonde girl with sunglasses at the beach party
Source: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt6710214/mediaviewer/rm4063704576

Hello, dear readers! I really thought I should not post so many movie reviews on my blog because it would literally turn it into a movie review blog but this movie just turned my world upside down. Anyone, who knows me well, knows that I am not the type of person, who loves documentaries but this… hits pretty close to home to everyone, who is 14 to 30 years old. And, because Dolls Have Hearts readers are in that age group, I just had to review this. This is not a usual movie review like the ones I have posted before. This is a life-changing movie. So, let’s dive right in!

I found out about this movie few days ago and the trailer didn’t look very promising. For some reason I thought that this movie will show that hook-up culture is okay and that’s just how things are in 21st century. Thankfully, it did not. I really liked that this movie was divided into several parts – a male perspective into hook-up culture, a female perspective into hook-up culture and several others. Even though the truth made me cringe and cry a lot, it was so brilliant just because it was very realistic. There is so much pressure on young people nowadays. Girls are expected to look like models on magazine covers because it seems that they can only be cool and good enough, if they are desired. Boys, on the other hand, are expected to have sex with as many possible because somehow it is one of the ways, how they can show off their manliness. The more women they have sex with, the more desirable they become. I can see this ideology existing in modern world but I still don’t understand, how we have become these animals, who have made sex and sexuality this huge, important thing that basically shows our value. I can’t even put into words, how fucked up this is.

Even though I have never been on of those girls, who are always desired by most guys, I know very well, how it feels to “be on the other side”. From early teen years I have realized that, if I am not sexually appealing in the eyes of the opposite sex (mostly her peers), no one will look at me twice. No one will talk to me, everyone will laugh at my clothes, body, the way I smile, talk and move. I am automatically treated like not good enough and like I don’t deserve love in general. At the same time I have seen those desirable girls around me. Do you think they were treated like queens? No, never. They were girls, who used to show as much skin as possible just to fit in and hang out with boys. Those were girls, who let boys touch their breasts behind the curtains at school discos and who often couldn’t even walk because they got too drunk, trying to prove guys that they are cool. They were the ones, who got fucked and made fun of later. So, it looks like no matter on which side you are, you can’t win.

Talking about boys – it was hard for me to understand their point of view until I saw this movie. I always thought they were just born evil and truly enjoyed sleeping with any girl they could get their hands on and then slut shaming them afterwards. It’s like… they were not really human. After watching “Liberated: the new sexual revolution”, I kind of started to realize that they are also in a very unpleasant situation. So much pressure is put on them, too. A guy can either choose to be the undesirable virgin, who gets bullied at school or a seemingly heartless player, who is pressure into sleeping with as many girls as possible just to be cool in the eyes of his friends. No matter what they do, they can’t win either.

Now that I have briefly told you what the movie is about and what are my thoughts on the hook-up culture that it describes, here is the trailer.  If you are in your teen years or in your twenties, I’d highly suggest you to watch this documentary. It explains so much of what is happening with young adults all around the world right now. In a fucked up way, indeed but still. Just watch it.

Until next time on Dolls Have Hearts!

Love, Porcelain Doll.

 

 

 

#GirlbossSeries : how to create your perfect evening routine.

Girl, sleeping on the sofa under blue blanket

Hello, dear readers! A little while back on Dolls Have Hearts I talked about, how important is to have a personalized morning routine to start your day the right way. Good news – #GirlbossSeries are not dead and I am back to talk about evening routine – something that most people either do not know about or just forget about. Now, think about, how your evening goes, from the time you get back home until the moment you go to sleep. Do you just walk through the door, throw your clothes on the chair and fall into bed because you are so tired? Do you order pizza and binge watch some Netflix series? If your evening looks similar to these examples, you need to create an evening routine as soon as possible! “But how?” You may ask. “And what should I even include in it?”

The purpose of evening routine is to get few last urgent tasks done and prepare you for a new, successful day. If you spend last few hours before going to sleep in front of your computer screen, it will take longer for you to fall asleep and, if you are anything like me, it will leave you fewer hours of sleep during the night. It is so easy to start watching Youtube videos or TV series and to keep telling yourself: “Oh, just one more episode…” until you realize it is 2 a.m. and you only have about 4 or 5 hours left to sleep. Get rid of this poor habit by creating an evening routine. Here are some ideas that you can include in it.

  • Pick clothes for the next day.
  • Take off your make-up.
  • Do an evening workout or stretching. (Optional, because some people prefer to work out in the morning. Not me, though.)
  • Cook dinner or do some meal prep for the next day.
  • Take a shower.
  • Plan the next day in your planner or bullet journal.
  • Brush your teeth.
  • Read one chapter of a book.
  • Apply face cream.
  • Paint your nails.
  • Write your thoughts in your journal. (Lack ideas for what to write in it? A new post about journal prompts is coming soon on my blog!)
  • Put on some calming music. (Sometimes it makes me fall asleep faster. Check out my “Late night” playlist on Spotify here.)
  • Drink some chamomile tea (or any other tea that helps you to relax).
  • Pack your bag for the next day.
  • Do 10 min clean up. (Even if it means just watering your plants and changing bed sheets or organizing your desk.)
  • Set alarms and put your phone away. (Do not fall asleep with your phone in your hands while scrolling through Twitter!)
  • Meditate.

Bold points in red are the ones I suggest you to do first because later you just will not feel like doing them. When you are already in your bed, reading a book, feeling a little sleepy, you probably will not be feeling like getting up and doing some meal prep. So, set your priorities straight and leave the most pleasant stuff right before going to sleep. Now, when I have told you about how to create your evening routine, I feel like I really should rearrange mine. Getting straight into bed with a cup of tea and binge watching Youtube videos is my a bad habit of mine, especially lately, when I have no motivation for my studies at school. Even working as a teacher seemed way more exciting than studying music. However, as I mentioned in my previous post – there is a light at the end of the tunnel, which is getting into my dream university and starting over almost from a blank page. If you, just like me, find it hard to follow your morning and evening routines, and planning, find your “light at the end of the tunnel”. What are you looking forward to? Why are you going through all of this and what do you want to achieve? Even if that is the goal no one else but you believes, stick with that. There is always a hope. Besides – following your morning and evening routines, and keeping up bullet journaling will feel as easy as one, two, three, if you know where you are heading.

That is all for today’s post on Dolls Have Hearts and I will see you next week with a new, inspiring post! Have a lovely week!

Love, Porcelain Doll.

Life update: career goals, school, love and everything else.

Mountains and hands, holding flowers

Hello, dear readers! No matter what, I am promising you and myself to stay consistent at blogging. This time my life got so messy that I had no proper post to prepare, so I am writing this instead and letting you know, how things are going.

University applications have stressed me out a lot. In the middle of January I applied to five UK universities through UCAS. So far I have received three conditional offers, one rejection and… probably will receive another rejection, which makes me wonder, if choosing BA in Creative writing was a good idea in the first place. However, my favorite university offered me the place almost immediately and, even though they did not ask for a writing example, I am excited that they gave me a chance. I will not reveal the name of the university yet but all I can say right now is that it is located in incredibly beautiful place, has a lot of student societies, lovely and affordable dorms and wonderful Fresher’s week events. Even though applying to uni abroad seems a little hectic, I can not wait until I am done and, in a way, starting my life over. New town, new school, new friends and… new me.

Current school is making me very unhappy. I notice that I do not fit in at all and the thing is – I do not want to. However, I would rather get away from it all as quick as possible than dwell in this routine. Lessons do not excite me anymore – most musical subject are way too dry and boring. Most people around me seem completely different from me. No one likes to read, no one is interested in self-improvement, no one is writing a blog… Nothing. I feel like a swan between pigeons. When it comes to self-expression in music, I have completely made up my mind to get higher education in some other subject. I am just not charismatic and extroverted enough to succeed. I feel like I am completely failing at what I do and no one helps me to get out of it. Anyways, there are just three months left, so I am counting down days.

Love, oh love… Does it still exists nowadays? I feel like most people do not know what love even is, they just assume they know what it is. Communication between people, especially women and men is fucked up. Women feel too much but men are repulsed by emotional women. It is like they want some kind of blow-up doll, who could also cook and clean the house. Anything else? Meaningless. Just God forbid you tell them, how you really feel. They are disgusted by vulnerability and affection. Romantic type of love seems to have died out. However, there is a certain male person, whose name I will not mention with who I can be myself. No, we are not a couple and we will never be. We are not even in love. Maybe we are just friends, who lack a certain type of intimacy, so get it from each other. (And no, I am not talking only about sex.) He does not get repulsed when I am emotional, he calms me down instead. Surprisingly, he even like how I play the guitar. I have never met someone, whose occupation in not creative and who enjoys the music I perform that much. I am not in love but I simply appreciate him. Life has weird ways of introducing you with people, who later gain meaning in your life. He is one of them. Maybe, after I graduate, I will never see him again but I will be thankful that I once knew him. He is the reason I still do not believe that “all men are the same”.

I am getting addicted to writing. A little more than a month ago I bought beautiful hardcover notebook. I, just like many others, have a weakness for blank, beautiful and thick notebooks. I might have ten of them at home but I will still buy one more just because writing certain things in a certain notebook feels right. So, I bought the notebook to grow my writing habit. To make it a little harder, I decided to write in it only in English. I started out with a page or half page a day but now I can write several pages each day and still want more. The point of this is to make my language flow more easily, get used to writing in English and get rid of perfectionism. It is so easy to stumble upon words, trying to find the right one and get stuck because of the feeling that nothing you write will ever be good enough. Screw that feeling. Sometimes the only way to write something great is to “vomit” words and feelings all over the page and edit it later. If you love writing but still have not developed the habbit of doing it every day, this is your chance. Start like I did – slowly but fearfully. And read a lot to keep your thoughts and ideas fresh.

That is all I have to say for today. I will just pick up my writing journal and brain dump some more thoughts in to it because nothing is as satisfying as that. Until next time on Dolls Have Hearts!

Love, Porcelain Doll.

20 things to do before turning 20 years old.

Woman sitting in swings in the forest

Hello, dear readers! Before I start this post, I’m just curious – how many of you are still under 20? If you are older than that – don’t worry, you might still make your life more exciting by crossing out few more things of this list that you have not done yet. I am turning twenty at the end of this year and started wondering, if there is something out there that I should have experienced but probably haven’t yet. It is so easy to get caught up in a never-ending routine and forget do things that you truly enjoy doing. So, without any further hesitation, here is a list of 20 things you should do before you turn 20, in order to make your life a little more colourful. 

P.S. Just to make this a little more interesting, I will add little checkmarks beside every thing that I have done so far. Join me, if you wish!

  1. Have your first kiss. ✓ 
  2. Start a journal (an art journal, travel journal, morning pages – anything that floats your boat).  (I have an art journal and writing journal where I practice writing everything that’s on my mind in English.)
  3. Learn to cook at least 3 healthy and delicious meals. Living on your own is way easier, if your only menu options are not just few different kinds of pizza that you bought at the nearest supermarket. ✓ (Here are my favourites that I can cook anytime I want: tomato soup, pancakes with mushroom filling, risotto, greek salad, potato puree etc.)
  4. Do a random act of kindness. Buy someone flowers for no reason, bake them cookies or do any other nice thing to someone. (Here’s the first thing on the list that I haven’t done yet. I still have time for that, though.)
  5. Clean your closet from all the clothes that don’t fit, are worn-out, make you look bad or don’t suit your style anymore. It is time to get rid of those ugly jeans you have not worn since 9th grade but still miraculously hope to look good it. It will not happen, just buy new ones. ✓ (The best feeling in the world is when you open your closet and every piece of clothing fits you, looks brand new and flatters your figure.)
  6. Go to a concert of a musician you really like. (No, the one your mum made you to attend does not count. This time it is about what YOU like. My first concert of that kind was One Republic concert a little more than 3 years ago.)
  7. Make a day free, so you can treat yourself by doing whatever makes you happy.  (For me such day could include applying a face mask, painting my nails, reading for an hour in bed, baking pizza and watching a movie (or few).)
  8. Go skinny dipping. (Damn, this has been on my list for way too long. If I will not chicken out, might cross this out sometime in summer.) 
  9. Get a job, even it is just a summer job. This is a very unique experience and, honestly, the earlier you try it, the better.   (Once you experience that lovely moment when you receive your first salary, you will never want to go back.)
  10. Spend a day without internet. No need to freak out – it is really not that bad. You can just enjoy reading a book, dancing in your living room or whatever your favorite activity is and stop worrying about how many followers you have on Instagram, compared to your friends. ✓ (I have done this so many times. It feels so good that sometimes I want to delete all of my social media and just live my life. However, I can’t do that, I have this precious blog.)
  11. Travel abroad, even if it’s only to your neighbour country. ✓ (Nothing feels as good as seeing new places and trying new foods, trust me.)
  12. Throw a house party at your place. Just try not to make it like real life version of “Project X”. ✓ (Once in my entire life I actually had a decent party with 10+ people at my place. Even though such parties are not really my thing, it was fun to try it out.)
  13. Try to live as a vegetarian or vegan for a week. ✓ (I’ve tried it several years ago for a month. Then, since the beginning of this year, I decided to become a vegetarian on a long-term, instead of just trying it.)
  14. Dye your hair in an unusual colour. ✓ If you are afraid to try permanent colour, try the one that washes out in a week or two. (I’ve dyed my hair in crazy colours twice – once partially purple, once partially green.
  15. Write a letter for your future self. If you are still 19 years old like me, write a letter for your 29 years old version.
  16. Get a tattoo. ✓ (I was obsessed with this idea since the age of 12 or so. 6 years later I finally got my first tattoo – a phoenix – and that was one of the best decisions I have ever made. If you want to read more about it, click here.)
  17. Dare to do something you are afraid of. Is it going to uni abroad? Maybe reconnecting with an old friend? Getting a piercing? No matter what it is, just do it. ✓ (I admit that I was a little afraid to get a tattoo and very afraid of speaking up in class but I faced these fears and I am proud that I did.)
  18. Let go of toxic friendships and relationships. It does not matter, how good someone treated you way back in the past. If this person makes you unhappy and talking things out have not helped, move on (even that is not easy at all). ✓ 
  19. Learn to play a musical instrument. You don’t have to become a complete professional, learning how to play your favorite song on the piano might be just enough. ✓ (It’s no secret that I basically grew up with a guitar in my hands. I can play way more than just my favorite song.)
  20. Figure out where are you heading in life. Nothing is worse than being less than a month away from graduating from high school and having no idea, what you want in life and what is coming up next. You do not have to figure out your whole life at the age of 15 but when you are finally 20 years old, you should know at least briefly, what is the next step. ✓ (UK – here I come! (Hopefully. It’s to early to celebrate but I am on my way.))

So those are all of my ideas for under twenty bucket list. Which of these things have you done already and which are you planning to do soon? Let me know in the comments. 🙂 Until next time on Dolls Have Hearts!

Love, Porcelain Doll.

“Rebel in the rye” – a movie that every writer needs to watch.

Rebel in the rye movie poster with Nicholas Hoult and Kevin Spacey

Hello, dear readers! Today I am back with another movie review. Do you know what kind of movies I love the most? The ones that are about writers. It doesn’t matter, if it’s based on real life events or not  – those type of movies just get me inspired and make me feel like someday I could accomplish something similar some day. There’s just something beautiful about the creative madness they portray. The struggle, the pain, love, sometimes even mental illness – all this mix tends to blow me away.

Today I’m reviewing “Rebel in the rye” – a movie, based on true events from J. D. Salinger’s life. What’s even better – Nicholas Hoult is starring the main role as Salinger himself. If you don’t know that – Nicholas Hoult is my favorite male actor and no, that’s not only because of TV series “Skins”, even though that’s exactly how I discovered him. Anyways, back to the movie. Even though it received only 28% on Rotten Tomatoes  and was rated 6,6/10 on IMDB , I thought it is worth mentioning it because, honestly, it is underrated by critics and definitely is a success not a failure. The plot follows Salinger’s life and starts few years before he goes to War when he struggles to publish his first work, meets Oona O’Neil and ends with the portrayal of his life after publishing “The Catcher in the Rye”’. You can watch the trailer here, before I continue with my thoughts about the movie.

So, besides Nicholas Hoult in main role, I loved the portrayal of a struggling writer, who does not know, if he is any good but continues to write anyway. There was one quote that stuck in my mind the most, which is this: “Are you willing to devote your life to telling the stories, knowing that you may get nothing in return? And if the answer to that question is no, well, then you should go out there and find yourself something else to do with your life because you are not a true writer.” It really made me think a lot about how I feel about writing and shed a tear because there is nothing more beautiful that a person, who is truly passionate about something. So passionate that he’s almost on the edge of madness.

When it comes to war scenes, they were very sad, grievous and definitely not easy to watch. Violence and tragic events in movies usually do not affect me but these scenes really did. I really got into the movie and it almost broke my heart, knowing that the main character could not survive and “The catcher in the rye” could have never been written. Thankfully, as you all know, Salinger survived and that is the reason why such well know book “The rebel in the rye” exists. Even though some people gave the movie two and three star reviews, I will have to disagree with them because I love the movie so much that I started crying close to the end because it really impressed me in the best way and got me thinking about my own passion for writing.

Overall rating: 9/10

If you are a writer or a passionate reader, who appreciates more than just chick flicks, you will really enjoy this movie. Until next time on Dolls Have Hearts when I will be back with different kind of post. (Seriously, this is second movie review in a row, I can’t go on like this forever.)

Love, Porcelain Doll.

Review of “Raw” – shockingly gruesome French horror drama movie.

"Raw" movie poster of a girl with bleeding nose

Hello, dear readers! If there are any horror movie buffs between my followers, I guarantee that you will love this movie. Even though I usually prefer American or British dramas, this French horror / drama caught my eye when I was randomly browsing movies just several days ago. The trailer did not explain movie that well but it was enough to draw me in.

Garance Marillier

The main character Justine (starring Garance Marillier) is a life-long vegetarian, who begins her studies at veterinary school where her parents met and which her older sister Alexia currently attends. During freshman hazing rituals Justine is forced to eat a peace of raw rabbit kidney. At first she’s repulsed by that and even gets skin rash after eating it, however, later she starts craving raw animal meat. It’s not that creepy until the point where accident happens with her sister Alexia and Alexia’s finger gets cut off. She faints but Justine calls 911 and starts waiting. This is when first extra creepy part happens – Justine starts eating her sister’s finger. Moments later Alexia wakes up and catches Justine doing it but her reacting is a little odd. A normal person would run out of the room, scared in this case but all that happens is – a tear slides down Alexia’s cheek. Later on several other things happen in the movie: Justine has sex with her “gay” roommate, bites off part of random dude’s lip while making out with him, has public fight with Alexia which turns out to be very wild, bloody and… cannibalistic. I don’t want to spoil too much for you, so I’m cutting the summary short. I literally have no idea, how to describe “Raw” in an interesting way without spoiling all the details.

 

Now, when the plot is roughly explained, here’s what I thought of it. First of all, Garance Marillier (She’s the same age as me. Somehow surprising.) was brilliant in her character. The contrast between normal, “every day” version Justine and the one, who craves human flesh was huge and a little surprising. Alexia (starring Ella Rumpf) was pretty well-played, too, however, the character in general kind of repulsed me. Especially after what she did with Adrian (Rabah Nait Oufella). When it comes to Adrian, I found his relationship with Justine a little fascinating. There was something there. Although I hoped that it will turn out differently. Or maybe I just wished for more erotic moments in the movie because AV CLUB described it as: “Beautifully realized and disturbingly erotic.” (Honestly, I have no idea what AV CLUB is, I just noticed that review in the movie trailer.) Sure, it was erotic in some weird way but still.

Surprisingly, in general I really enjoyed the movie (even though finger chewing scene definitely made me want to look away). I have to admit that it was powerful and mind-blowing. Also, if you decide to watch it – the plot twist at the very end is just perfect in some twisted way, it gives the movie so much-needed closing and explanation why everything happens the way it does. After watching “Raw” I couldn’t return to reality for quite some time and while I’m writing this, I’m still partially confused and impressed by what I’ve seen. However, the fact that “Raw” wasn’t pure gore porn and actually had a decent plot is a huge pro.

Overall rating: 9/10

That’s all I have to say for this movie. If you are ready to get creeped out, grossed out and turned on all in one movie, this is a must watch. Also, if you have any foreign movie suggestions for me, feel free to leave them in the comments and I will watch them and review them on the blog. 🙂 Until next time on Dolls Have Hearts!

Love, Porcelain Doll.

Health and body image update: part one.

Brunette in workout clothes, stretching on the street

Hello, dear readers! I’m publishing this post a little later than expected because life is not exactly a long walk on the beach and with all the things happening in my life, it was hard to find a time to write a post. Yet, here I am. Just twenty-four hours ago I was sure that I want to whine about how stressful my life is right now but then remembered Dolls Have Hearts is really not the right place for that. I will whine in my personal notes later, however today I came here to talk about something more positive that is going on.

I do not know, if I mentioned earlier in any of the posts but since December I started working out again and since January I’m back on track again. Many months ago I kind of fell off the track of working out, constantly told myself that I am too busy and/or tired to do that until I stopped working out at all. The worst thing is that I even told myself I am better off without it. I had lost most of the muscle gains I got during two years of training but still maintained about the same weight. For a while I did not really care until certain thoughts started crossing my mind. Am I still healthy? Do I eat healthy? Should I eat less sweets? Do I eat too much in general? Maybe I should start working out again? Two months later (in December) I finally decided to get myself together and get healthy again. It was not easy to get back on track but I did it.

This time I created more compact and balanced workout plan. I had few exercises under categories: butt exercises, arm exercises, ab exercises, other exercises and yoga. First three included one exercise for each specific area, for example, glutes but the last one was just few yoga poses to do at the end of workout to strengthen my body in general and calm down. Let me tell you, Warrior 2 – that’s a real killer. You might think it is not a big deal to get in that pose but holding it is a real challenge.

One thing that I just recently learned to do is enjoying not only the results but also the process. Ever since I started going to PE lessons at school, I hated them more or less the whole time. And I hate them the most right now – in middle school. Just to make this clear – I hate lessons not exercising in general. PE lessons in my school mostly include team sports and just a tiny bit of strength training. Whenever we have strength training and some useful exercises, our teacher rarely explains, how to do them the right way and they all happen in such a rush because no one’s really interested in doing them or, even more, enjoying the process. What’s the result? Well, injuries and / or terribly sore muscles in all the wrong places for next 5 – 6 days. But enough about that.

The last thing I wanted to do for the part one of this health update is share my current workout plan. Yes, it is self-made but I am careful enough not to push myself too hard and injure myself. I have categorized them and written in random order. When I actually work out, I just mix them up.

Ab exercises:

  • 30 crunches
  • 30 bicycle crunches
  • 30 leg lifts (while lying on back)
  • 30 raised leg, bent knee crunches
  • Boat pose (holding as long as I can, 3 times)
  • Side plank (both sides for at least 1 minute)

Butt exercises:

  • 15 fire hydrants (for each leg)
  • 30 straight leg raises (while laying on stomach)
  • 30 bent leg raises (while laying on stomach)
  • 30 both bent leg raises (while laying on stomachs)
  • 30 donkey kicks
  • 30 hip raises

Arm exercises:

  • 45 bent over row (with 1 kg dumbbells)
  • 45 shoulder presses (same weights)
  • 45 (unidentified exercise, couldn’t find the name)
  • 45 (one more unidentified exercise)

Yoga poses:

  • Tree pose 1 (holding as long as I can, mostly 2 mins on each leg)
  • Warrior 2 (holding as long as I can; about 20 secs each leg for now)

Other:

  • 30 jumping jacks

Also, I haven not forgotten about warm ups and cool downs but I decided not to mention them here. Anyways, that’s about it for my current workout routine. I try to do it 3 – 4 times a week. The best thing about it? Even though I feel a little sweaty after it, there’s barely any soreness the next day, most of the time there’s none at all. That is it for part one of my health update.

Do you do any of these exercises I have mentioned? And how often do you work out? Let me know in the comments. 🙂 Until next time on Dolls Have Hearts!

Love, Porcelain Doll.