The less visible sister of fat shaming – skinny shaming.

Skinny brunette in workout clothes, walking down the street

Hello, dear readers! By now I think you have all heard of fat shaming. Curvy people, especially women have raised awareness about it a lot during last few years. It is no secret that media has been pushing the image of “perfect woman” onto us for quite a long time. We are still drowning in magazine articles about getting beach body and different diets that will help us lose x amount of pounds every month. However, there is one side of body shaming that has not been covered as much and it is skinny shaming. Yes, that is really a thing! Why am I writing about this? Well, because I have been fat shamed as well as skinny shamed.

During my childhood years I was somewhere in the middle – not really chubby but also not skinny. However, I despised PE lessons and ate what ever I wanted, so I was no way considerable as the fit one. Being a kid and hating sports was not cool at all, so I quickly became the main object of mockery in my school. Most of my bullies were boys, who were skinny and loved sports. They could eat all the junk food in the world and still stay the same way. However, if I would eat too much pizza or cookies, my body would show it after some time. I was a girl and being tall and thin was not in my genes. I was jealous at girls, who were like that. The self consciousness made me feel terrible about my thighs, who seemed way too thick at the time (I mean, how thick can be thighs of a ten-year old, who is not overweight?) and small stomach roll that I had while sitting down. For nine years straight I was laughed at because of my body and fat shamed almost every day. It did not mater, if I tried eating less or dressing differently – I was still the ugly, weird and fat kid. This nightmare ended after middle school.

About a year before graduating from middle school I started working out. Of course, results did not show that quickly but I was getting there. After middle school I decided to continue my studies in a different city and different school. Things seemed to get better – my schoolmates did not care about my looks at all and the fat shaming was over. However, soon after that when my workout results finally started showing, I experienced something as uncomfortable which was skinny shaming. As I continued to workout, my stomach rolls disappeared, hip bones, ribs and collar bones started showing a little bit more. I was eating healthier than before and still had normal BMI, however, my parents started getting worried with no apparent reason. I started getting a lot of comments from them that I workout too much and suggested me to workout less and eat more. I could not understand their reaction. I finally started feeling better about my body after all the fat shaming and now this? My parents have never been on the thin side, so this fact made me nervous from early childhood. Will I look like this when I grow up? I didn’t want to. I wanted to be like one of those fit, happy girls you can see on Pinterest and Instagram. Why was is such a bad idea? My parents should have been happy that I wasn’t one of those girls, who look at thinspo every day and starve themselves.

During last  4 years I’ve been working out and eating healthier but their remarks didn’t stop. Especially from my dad. I wanted to feel better about my body and love it but comments like: “You should eat more. Your breasts have become smaller. Your hip bones are showing too much. Your ribs are showing too much. Are you trying to starve yourself? The way you look isn’t healthy. Stop starving yourself. Stop working out so much.” made me insecure and unhappy. You might think that having a slimmer body would make me more confident. It didn’t. I still listened to what people are saying about it. I felt insecure about my hip bones and the fact that I sometimes got bruises on them after workouts, I felt stressed out because I couldn’t find pants that fit me just right. Most of them were too tight in the area of my thighs and too loose around my waist. I felt insecure about my breasts that were never too big but now got even smaller. I was jealous to girls, who could wear nice lingerie, push up bras and actually have something to put inside them. I was almost flat, I still am.

I shouldn’t hate my body, I should love it and you should do the same with yours. It’s okay to have thick thighs, it’s okay to have tiny breasts, it’s okay have boyish body with no curves or very curvy one without small waist. I’m here to tell you what no one has told me – love your body the way it is now. It doesn’t matter, if people tell you that you’re too skinny, too muscular or too chubby. There is no such thing as perfect bikini body and you shouldn’t stress about getting it. There is not one universal body shape everyone should and would be able to fit. No matter what body type you have, it has its own beauty. Stop listening to media and society in general, who’s telling you that you need an ass like Kim Kardashian or body like Keira Knightley, or that you can’t wear crop tops because your stomach isn’t perfectly flat. Wear what makes you feel good, don’t torture yourself in order to look like someone else. You already have a full package of what you need. Sure, you can do some ab workouts or squats, eat more veggies and treat it like a temple but… never take it for granted. You are beautiful in your own skin – embrace it here and now.

That’s all for this week’s blog post. I hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as enjoyed writing it. See you next week with another great article. 🙂

Love, Porcelain Doll.

10 inspiring Tumblr tags you will love.

Hello, dear readers! I, just like a very big part of the population, have been using Tumblr for years. have had several accounts and have taken few breaks from the site. However, I have to admit that this blogging platform is incredibly great because it takes very little effort to create your blog, it’s easy to promote it and even more – your blog does not have to be made mainly for other people’s eyes like WordPress, Blogger and other blogging platform blogs are. Tumblr blog can be like your online diary, it can be your safe place, if you are trying to lose weight (I’m not talking about thinspo, bonespo and skinspo here, those tags are way too dark.), find friends while battling a mental illness or just simply get inspired. This is why Tumblr has been my most favorite place on the internet. No matter, who you are, you can find friends there. Today I wanted to show you that Tumblr consists of more than pro ana personal blogs and a lot of teenage blogs, who are reblogging #grunge , #pale , #couple pictures. I am sharing those 10 tags to show you, why I am so obsessed with Tumblr in a good way.

10 inspiring Tumblr tags you will love

  1. #studyblr / #studyspo It is no secret that a lot of students are using Tumblr and yes, college students, too. Under these tags you can find pictures of neat, beautiful notebooks, bullet journals and aesthetically pleasing study spaces. Even if you do not really like school, this will make you hyped up and motivated enough to finish that homework as good as possible.
  2. #artjournaling / #artjournal You do not even have to be super creative and artsy to look up this tag and start creating your own art journal. The point in journaling is getting all your emotions and thoughts out. Do not worry about the result, enjoy the process! I consider art journaling very useful to everyone, especially from people, who suffer from mental illnesses. This will make you feel better and maybe you will want to look back at your old journals few months or years later.
  3. #booklr / #bibliophile / #bookblr If you are a book worm like me, you will love this. Under these tags you can find ideas of book to read next, some quotes from books and really beautiful pictures that will make you close the site and pick up a book again.
  4. #bulletjournal / #bujo If you love planning your day or would like to get started with it in a journal not an app, this tag will be for you. You planner does not have to be plain and boring. Get some inspiration under these tags!
  5. #fitspo / #fitfam / #fitblr If you are a fitness junkie, this will take you to all the motivation you need to push harder and get healthier. Motivational quotes, healthy recipes, before and after pics, exercise ideas and pictures that describe your dream body.
  6. #langblr / #langspo If you are a poliglot or simply decided to learn a new language, get some inspiration here, find some pretty notes and vocabularies. Who knows – maybe starting from tomorrow you will start learning Italian!
  7. #journalclub I have mentioned bullet journals and art journals before but there are even more types of journals out there: movie journals, travel journals and more. Under this tag you can find all of these and chose which type you want to start.
  8. #motivation / #inspiration / #quotes Yes, sometimes tags are that simple. Need inspiration? Look for it on Tumblr!
  9. #tumblrroom I do not know a place where to find better room decoration ideas than on Tumblr. A lot of these might be feasible in your own dorm room. Some fairy lights, photos. fluffy pillows and done! Your room is cozier than ever.
  10. #spilledink / #spilledthoughts / #spilledwords / #writersontumblr Are you a blogger or writer, who lacks inspiration? Say no more. These tags will get your mind running again.

There you go – now you know where to look for inspiration when you do not have any. I mentioned more tags here because there were many similar and related to each other. I wish you a happy Tumblr journey but beware – it can get a little addicting! 🙂

Love, Porcelain Doll.